GW9 REVIEW – The Hammer of the gods

Welcome to the GW9 Review – The Hammer of the Gods

The hammer of the gods
Will drive our ships to new lands

Led Zeppelin, Immigrant Song

In case there was any doubt, the hammer is a certain Erling Haaland, the ships are his Man City teammates trailing listlessly in his almighty wake (well, maybe apart from a certain Ginger Prince) and the new lands are the hallowed halls of a hat-trick of premier league titles (last achieved by Man United in 2008/9) and a maiden Champions League win.

And who would bet against him? It’s almost like it’s not even a team game anymore! Some of the records he’s setting and breaking: the first player to score three successive home premier league hat-tricks (he now has as many PL hat-tricks as Ronaldo, Vardy and Lampard), the fastest to 3 PL hat-tricks taking just 8 games (previous fastest: Michael Owen who took 48), he’s 9 goals away from last year’s golden boot ….. he has 30 matches left to play and at his current scoring rate will score 66 goals this season (thank you FPL Blackbox!).

If Harry Kane is World Class (which he is), Erling Haaland is Worlder Class. Worldy Class? Certainly in a class of his own.

So now you’d better stop and rebuild all your ruins. For peace and trust can win the day despite all your losing

Led Zeppelin, Immigrant Song

I’m not sure how much peace and trust will help Man Utd in picking up the pieces of a 6-3 drubbing – there’s certainly ruins to rebuild though and not long to do it. Next up is the Premier League’s meanest defence ….. no not City again, and no certainly not Liverpool. Everton would you believe! I certainly couldn’t believe it when I heard that earlier so I had to check it and yes Everton have the conceded the fewest goals this season (7). Anyone ringing the Tarko bell?

It was a high scoring FPL gameweek this week – the higest scoring of season so far. Led of course by our favourite Norwegian Haaland (23), but there were goals everywhere you looked. Unless you were watching the turgid nonsense put out by Aston Villa and Leeds.

Arsenal vs Spurs kicked things off nicely with returns for Jesus (8), Martinelli (4) and Kane (6). Eddie Howe had the decency to hook almost his entire defence two minutes before Newcastle conceded preserving the cleanies for Trippier (7) among others

One lucky FFUKer owns Trossard (20). I don’t know who you are but I’d like to take a little peak into your crystal ball please! His FFUK ownership won’t stay at 0.4% for very long after his hat-trick at Anfield. Meanwhile Liverpool assets continue to disappoint and surely represent a collective hard sell.

The aforementioned Everton won again – I’m not convinced by any of their players yet, but there’s a few knocking on the proverbial managers door asking when the gaffer is going to give them a game. Are West Ham finding some form? As a hammer myself I bloody well hope so! The goal and assist for Bowen (14) is a welcome return to FPL form. Is this is a sign of things to come?

The Manchester derby didn’t just bring returns for his magnificence, but also for other FPL assets like The Ginger Prince (8) and Foden (19). Frustratingly they can’t seem to keep a clean sheet, mind, and while I wouldn’t put it past City dishing out Southampton’s annual nine goal thrashing, I also wouldn’t put it past Southampton to get one or two at the other end. Che Adams anyone?

Which leads us onto the final match of the gameweek, feauring the most transferred-in player of the week. Despite Leicester sitting bottom of the table, a goal in gameweek 7 led hundreds of thousands of managers to bring in Maddison (18) and they weren’t disappointed with two goals and one assist in a four nil drubbing of what looks like a sorry Forest side. They’ve got Villa next week, so while the smart money is on 0-0, there’s chance there to get their season back on track.

So let’s turn our attention to the team of the week:

FPL team of the week for gameweek 8

Senesi anyone? No I didn’t think so! Could Connor Coady (9) be our way into the Toffees’ defence though?

After this week the FFUK top 20 looks like this:

FFUK top 20 after gameweek 8

The tremendous 128 points carded by Brendan Ryan (1st) carries him to the top of the league on 585 points. Brendan is currently 3,942 in the world. Chapeau! He was matched this week by David Harrison (2nd) although David trails Brendan by 5 points overall. The next highest FFUK score carded by Nick Hardie (44th) trailed some 14 points back on 114. Overall 21 managers broke the 100 barrier – well done to all of those.

No manager of the month to award this week, so we’re onto the Conts.

Jack Rackley scored just 46 points this week and is duly evicted. Aptly called WoodenSpoonFC, Jack doesn’t even have Haaland, much less captained him.

Gameweek 9 will bring one more eviction, and bring us one week closer to the gameweek 14 Halloween Horror Show!

That’s all from me.

Peace and trust. I need it with all my losing!!

Bakes – Red 5 (130th) (but green arrows this week!)

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