Now ladies and gentlemen, I have a question for you. How did you feel on Monday morning? Did you feel clean? Did you feel fresh?

After all those clean sheets we’ve all been waiting for it would have been nice to wake up feeling fresh, but of course, the fantasy gods aren’t that kind. You see, when we ask for clean sheets, we get clean sheets, and we get a load of em. 9 to be exact. And what does that mean? Ahem, a considerable lack of goals. Just 19 scored this weekend. Feel dirty? Me too.

The weekend started with my new boy Son (3) getting subbed off as Spurs were held by Bournemouth to 0-0, the 2nd clean sheet in 4 games for both Spurs and the Cherries. If like me you played your Spurs attacker and benched your Bournemouth def you probably didn’t feel very fresh. Kindly, for those with their defenders, Arsenal, Boro, Stoke, Swansea, Watford and even West Ham followed suit and got lovely clean sheets. Amat in your team? Collins? Then you’ll know they didn’t play, a particularly bitter twist if you put one of those two on your pitch. But this also meant that unless you were clever (lucky) enough to own Shaqiri, Bolasie, or someone else that no one owns, then you didn’t get any goals in.

I fear the Liverpool mids may frustrate. I’m currently assessing whether it’s worth owning any of them considering they all take it in turns to score. Mane (12), Coutinho (10) and Firminho (5) were all in the points in the 2-1 defeat of West Brom, but only one man came away from that game really happy… Daron Russell (67th) had McAuley’s goal (9) off the bench, as Daz had both Collins (0) and Amat (0) in front of him in the pecking order (sure, Mane and Coutinho owners were probably alright).


Chris Galloway (35th) correctly predicted the City score for me, 1-1. But he did this far too late, Saturday night in fact. In future Chris, please give me correct scores in advance so that I can act accordingly. At least he didn’t follow his own advice 😉 City stumbled again.

Oh yeah, I just remembered why the weekend was not a complete waste.

If there’s anyone out there who didn’t see it, or hear about it, Chelsea smashed Jose’s Man United by 4 goals to nil on Sunday. A walkover. Man United looking hapless, clinging on to the memory of holding Liverpool to a 0-0 draw. Oh dear. Poor old United, I have to say that at one point I wanted Jose to succeed, like, for old times sake. I’m over that.


The only bad thing is that Chelsea didn’t even look that good. Or is that a good thing? I still don’t trust the players yet, but I have faith in Conte. You could even say I love Conte.

But what about the FFUK top 50…

Screenshot 2016-10-24 at 6.35.40 PM.pngScreenshot 2016-10-24 at 6.35.56 PM.png

Pray thanks for small glories ey?

How about this? John Harper (2nd) did just what Nick Johns (1st) did last week. From 3rd in the league he achieved a whopping 74 points on a  week where the average was just 42 points. That’s big. John had basically everyone that got points this weekend. He had Shaqiri (15), he had Bolasie (9), he had Payet (7), he had Mane (12), Bellerin (7), Cech (7), Lukaku (5), I think you get the gist of it. Anyone who got some points, John has them. He even had a clean sheet on the bench with Smith (6). That’s some natty transfer action 2 weeks ago from John right there. Well done John.

Nick Johns (1st) did ok too, scoring 43, but of course that 30 point lead he earned last week was instantly swallowed up. Darrel Cooper (3rd) moved up the table from 4th scoring 58 points, as Robert Simpson (5th) suffered a slide with just 35 points. Darrel benefited from an unusual Kante (8) and Matic (6) combo (although Matic was on the bench), backed by Mane, Bolasie and a triple clean sheet courtesy of Arsenal and Spurs players.


Nice to see so many Aguero-less teams doing well. John Harper is one, but also Ben Beill (8th) who flew up the table this week, Jason Beal (17th), Jim Wheat (16th), Mark Ford (18th), Paul Monger (20th), and Jimmy Prebble (4th) too. This is actually rather worrying for some of us ‘veterans’; that’s 7 of the current Top 20 who don’t own Sergio Aguero (1). Back to normal next week? I for one, hope so. Otherwise there will be big questions asked.

I talk a lot so just a quick mention for the lowest score on Page 1 for Neil Stewart (28th) with 30 points. Don’t worry Neil, I realise there were probably worse scores that have dropped off the page this week, but I can’t see them.

And finally, big shout out to my Dad, Mike Cronin (120th), who down in the depths of Page 3 achieved 73 points, the 2nd highest in the league. Dad, this puts you in the Top 20 for October scores, firmly rooting you in the FFUK Cup with all these big scorers. Keep it up!


So to Gameweek 10, the final qualifying week for the Cups. If you want to get into the FFUK Cup then you will need to get yourself into those Top 64 places for October this weekend. For the next best 128 the Challenge Cup awaits. With 1 round of qualification to go I am currently sitting in 78th position whilst Chris is down in 157th place for the month. For some of us, it’s a big ask, but with strength, determination, and a little luck, we can make it. In the words of Dizzee Rascal “if you believe you can achieve.”

I believe Dizzee. I believe.

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