GW7 Review – BallinG




So here we go again, it’s that time of the season.  I have pressed the button.

An awful showing in GW6 had left me biting my fingernails right up until the final whistle of the last game. Crystal Palace 1- Brighton 1 had seen me scrape through the Conts with a poultry 40 points. It was clearly more luck than judgement and more luck that others had picked worse than me (love ya JPC).  Shaw, Barnes, TAA you have let me down for the last time.


I’m sure we all have the same feelings about this curate’s egg of the game but with so many options and tactics available this year I was having  a tough time starting to create my team again from scratch, I’m not looking for sympathy but maybe next year we should set up some form of FFUK button pressed support group.

I’m not going to go through all seven stages we all must go through from shock and disbelief (at my previous weeks poor showing) through anger (why cant I have just .2 more million sh*%ty fu*”^ng game) depression (can I unpress the button? its just not worth it) but here I am on Friday night where I have finally reached acceptance and hope.

Saturday dawned and I was excited the sun was shining, the work laptop was in a drawer not to be thought about until Monday and I had the big three in my team! I had Chelsea and City defenders, and this was the first time since the halcyon days of Mesut Ozil and Alexis Sanchez that I had a big Arsenal representation in my squad. To be honest this is really as they are cheap and allow me to get the real big guns in, but it was a good feeling anyway.

Ronaldo – man is on fire and a goal machine

Lukaku © – seems to have found his form in Italy and is spearheading a Chelsea team who are many’s favouring for the title

Salah – consistently amazing – probably the best baller on the planet

What could go wrong?

Kings of the GamesweeK

What could go wrong?

Well it all could go wrong as you can see above of the big three only Salah scored well (but what a goal that was).

Ronaldo (1) was benched in a lacklustre United display against Everton.

And Lukaku (2) blanked as Chelsea got lucky against a plucky Southampton side holding them 1-1 until JWP got himself sent off. After that there was only one team in it as Werner (yes that’s right Werner) saw the net bulge and VAR not chalk off one of his strikes.

Both Wolves strikers lapped up the points with Hwang (13) really looking like a bargain, can he keep that dead eye finishing up? Two really nice goals Jimmy (10) with both assists.

In other games Spurs may have go the monkey off their back as they took down Villa but Harry Kane again blanked and is cutting a sad figure meandering around the pitch looking like he really doesn’t want to be there, Son saved their bacon again.

The big game Saw City and Liverpool share the spoils. After a dominant first half from the Citizens, Liverpool took the game to them in the second half. A wonderful goal from Foden (7) and deflected effort from KDB (8) pegging back Liverpool twice after Mane (7) broke the deadlock and a truly sumptuous strike from Magic Mo (13).

Can I have another wildcard please?

All Change at the TOp

Hats off to man like James Downie (489 points)   tearing up the table this week his score of 53 (courtesy of his mystic meg like pick of Ollie Watkins(6)) enough to top the table with Daron Russell (486 points) and Nick Johns (486 points) hot on his heels. Previous leader Harvey Smith still within spitting distance as we move into the dreaded international break.  Its all very close this year with c50 points spanning the top 100 so it’s still all to play for as we reach the ready money rounds!

Jack Clarke (21st) top scored this week with 73 points, passing the armband to  Vardy (16), Jimmy (10),  Townsend (10) and of course Mo Salah (13) enough to top this weeks scores and raise him to the edge of the top 20 in the table – well done that man.

The Conts

The absolute carnage this week with the team selections laid waste to many FFUKers team’s mine included, it was not pretty down and the sad end of the table with last year’s King Cont Peter Cronin (112th) lucky to escape the swinging axe this week, his 29 points just enough to see him live to stalk another day. We are however forced to say goodbye to Trevor Dennison and Scot Hassell whose hard-fought scores of 27 just weren’t enough this week.

Sorry lads the league is a poorer place without you.


To sum up:

This week left me bawling

Whilst Mo Salah is absolutely ballin’

Why don’t I just give him the armband every week.

Have a great International break, if you do get bored I hear there is a big fight this Saturday night…


Since drafting this something ese happened:

The man who makes the big mugs has finally sold Newcastle United. Newcastle have had a torrid time under Mike Ashley with Fifth their top finish since he took over some fourteen years ago with the two promotions from the Championship the only trophies. I’m sure Tyneside is rejoicing at seeing the back of him.  

 It really isn’t my place to say who should and should not be allowed to buy football clubs; the geopolitical landscape is a complicated one and I cannot pretend to understand all the ins and outs of it, after all it isn’t that long ago Arsenal was owned by a diamond dealer, hardly the most ethical of businesses.

I’ve decided just to be excited about Newcastle finally making some celestial signings. Let’s all hope that at least one of them as is bonkers as Faustino Asprilla.

Big Love

Mark Tarbox – Unwitting Accomplice (102nd)

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