Welcome to the GW25 REVIEW – You’re so Vain

“Leighton Baines, I bet you think this review is about you”

No this week’s ditty isn’t in honour of the FF legend that is Leighton Baines but rather a reference to how insufferable us Liverpool fans are becoming (some might say have always been) as we smash all records. It’ll probably get worse before it gets better so I’ll try get the Liverpool chat out of the way here. The good news is FFUK allows everyone to share the love (even the haters) and once more they delivered. Salah (16) captainers (pretty much everyone as the table below shows) were treated to a double digit haul, the defence delivered once more and anyone who had Firminio (11) had a nice little differential. Perhaps most surprising of all was Henderson (13) but with so many viable assets elsewhere surely even the most die hard Liverpool fans don’t have him in their team? And yet, 1.9% ownership suggests some do including our very own Kindergarden Klopp Dean Cummings. Unfortunately he had him as first sub, ouch. With Mane (£12.2) due back next week and a favourable run of fixtures NOR (A), WHU (H), WAT(A), BOU (H), the FFUK points should keep rolling in but seasoned managers will keep an eye on the upcoming champions league fixtures with Simeone’s tough tackling Atletico Madrid between GW26/27 and GW29/30 and the possibility that Klopp will switch his focus once the league is wrapped up in March (…”you’re so vain”).

And yet it could all have been so different. Had the referee or his video assistant spotted what looked a certain penalty on Danny Ings (2) it could have been his owners celebrating. Instead those of us jumped on Dings late are left wondering whether we missed the party? Again a kind run of fixtures Bur (H), AVL (H), WHU (A), NEW (H), NOR (A) suggests the bell isn’t tolling for Dings ownership just yet.

Dream Team GW 25

Elsewhere, Mason Mount (10) who just about everyone has bought and sold at some stage this season rewarded those who stuck with him – 15% ownership across the game overall. If any FFUKer owned Bournemouth’s Phillip Billing (10) take a bow, 0.1% ownership across the game. More likely to be in FFUKers teams is the man with the name like a villain from a Roald Dahl story or an actual character from Charles Dicken’s Pickwick Papers; Snodgrass (18). Those of us lucky enough to take a chance on him during double GW24 are left with a dilemma however as his upcoming fixtures are a sea of red starting with the truly horrific MCI (A) and LIV (A). And yet, those set piece deliveries could trouble any team.

Lloris stole the show at the back with his penalty heroics. Gundogan (0) on penalty duties has to be a worry for Aguero (2) owners although perhaps the responsibility will be passed back after that miss. With that uncertainty, rotation risk, some tricky fixtures and a blank in GW 28 I’m happy to just go with KDB (2) for now. Where I will be turning my attention however is to some of these high scoring defenders. Your man Yera Mina (15) scored twice as did Rudiger (16). Ake (9) took the bonus for Bournemouth but Fernandez (9) for Newcastle at just £4.4m is the one that really caught the eye. The Geordies don’t look like scoring much but they’re keeping it tight at the back and after their trip to Arsenal, which arguably isn’t even a red fixture anymore, their fixtures turn green. Why this interest in defenders? Well in news that could shake the FF world Chris Wilder only went and dropped Lord Lundstram. Was being one of the all time great fantasy assets going to his head? We’ll have to see if he gets his place back next week before panicking, but those smart enough to own Henderson (10) are well poised to absorb the loss. He’s well outscoring his more expensive rivals and again the fixtures are good; BOU (H), BHA (H), Blank, NOR (H). With Watford’s fixtures stiffening I’m considering swapping Foster (1) out for him but realistically it’ll be wildcard before I change keepers. And speaking of wildcards, a few desperate FFUKers activated theirs this week. Let’s see what that means for the table.

FFUK Top 20

No change at the top where Paul Baker (1) refuses to let the distraction of the cups detract from his league form. I was hoping to eat into his lead from second place and was confident going into Sunday but ultimately Pope (6) got the better of Aubameyang (2). The chasing pack are edging closer with several players scoring in the 70s. FFUKer of the week was a close run thing between Southcoast Gunner James Simpson (88) and Klopp’s Dreamers Nathan Boucher (91). Both took a -4 and needless to say both captained Salah (16). Henderson (10) and Snodgrass (18) were nice differentials for James but it was a staggering 40 points from Nathan’s back five that won it for him. Bottom of the pile is Game of Stones Jamie Shuel (25). His team looks suspiciously blue and on closer inspection contains no Liverpool players (…”You’re so vain”). Principle will get you nowhere in this game.

Prediction Corner / Challenge Lawro:

Below are my predictions as sent to the whatsapp group on Friday. After some justified scepticism about my fence sitting four of the five draws came off meaning I battered Lawro who only managed one correct result (Liverpool) and no correct scores. If only there was a way to make money from such endeavours…

Leicester 1 Chelsea 1
Bournemouth 1 Aston Villa 1
Crystal Palace 2 Sheff United 1
Liverpool 2 Southampton 0 
Newcastle 2 Norwich 0
Watford 2 Everton 1
West Ham 1  Brighton 1
Man Utd 2 Wolves 2
Burnley 1 Arsenal 1
Tottenham 1 Man City 3

Conts Eviction

Who goes this week in the CONTS mini league?

This weeks unlucky Cont is Alex Kassner. Alex stayed in by the skin of his teeth by one point last week and must have been hoping for a reprieve but in the end it was Lord Lundy’s 22 minute cameo that did for him as he had Mason Mount (10) poised to spring from the bench. Admin will remove you from the mini league. I’m sorry to say you’re mentioned again below Alex as you’ve been given a tough draw in the FFUK Champions League. Ings can only get better.

Kloppage Time

And so into Kloppage time and the start of the month is an exciting time for FFUKers with multiple cup competitions kicking off a new round. We’re down to the last 16 stage in the FFUK cup with a place in the quarter finals up for grabs. Here’s how things stand after week one:

1Andrew Downie67vsPaul Baker65
2Justin Mc Carthy70vsDave Windsor62
3John Willson58vsGregory Lyford50
4Shane Newton44vsStuart Allen54
5Ashley Cox61vsTrevor Dennison59
6Marc Speer60vsJamie Stephens78
7Sam Blake53vsPaul Browne66
8Jamie Stewart63vsVince .Siracusa42

Even more excitingly this month sees the FFUK Champions league kick off. The draw was made Friday night and despite a well oiled Irishman (yours truly) struggling with the names – Nõmme Kalju (EST), Shkëndija (MKD), Linfield (NIR), I mean come on – all participants were successfully assigned a team. Are you Real Madrid or Sutjeska? Liverpool or Saburtalo? How does it all work? All is revealed here:

I can reveal that the unlucky four who have to do it the hard way and get through the preliminary round are Vince Siaracusa as SP Tre Penne (SMR) v Steven Coffen as FC Santa Coloma (AND) and Alex Kassner as Feronikeli (KOS) vs Marcus Blowers as Lincoln Red Imps (GIB).

Oh and if you want to see the draw take place, though I’d advise against it, you can find it here. Probably for all eternity:

For Milk plate standings check out:

And finally, its never to early to start planning for blanks and doubles. @bencrellin on twitter is your only man here. I can’t say I fully understand all this info but it looks bloody useful:

That’s all folks, may all your FFUK dreams be more than just clouds in your coffee.


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